Mildly Frustrated at the Machine

Mildly Frustrated at the Machine — Ch 2.2

The gates of the magic city open, the greatest festival in Kouréas roars to life — and something in the machinery is wrong. A star’s microphone bursts in a puff of green smoke, a rock legend keels over swearing he’s already dead, and a pot of soup stands up and starts swinging. Every band on the bill is being quietly cursed by a hooded figure nobody can quite describe, and the crew who came to play the Battle of the Bands find themselves the only ones asking who’s pulling the strings. Why does the welcome message keep glitching on the exact same line? The show must go on — but this show has done it all before.

Chapter / Episode	2.2 — Mildly Frustrated at the Machine
Arc	Battle of the Bands
GM	Chris
Date / Duration	2024-11-30 · ~3h25m (gameplay from 00:03:32)
Party	Xeros (Dave), Nortle (Steve), Basil (Brin), Foulclaw (Jesse)
Joins / Departs	None — TBD remains ahead at the festival with his band Killasaurus (Chris runs the table)
Ends on	Director Wolfgang strikes a bargain: unmask the saboteur cursing his festival, and the crew gets the finale stage

Synopsis

After a quick recap of the road to Magus — the wristband chase through the Commons, Basil’s recorded tavern brawl with the tabaxi Renata (a 40,000-gold streaming windfall), and a napkin lit on fire while flirting with ticket-attendant Fran Dressa — the crew step into the fairgrounds proper as the pre-recorded voice of High Mage Altirius booms its endless welcome over the crowd. Xeros gives the table a tour of the “city of magic”: an opalescent wall ten miles around, an economy that runs on bartered spell slots, and a first ring called The Arcade that loops away into infinity. Cutting through the Main Stage Tent (Tent of Holding) — a few thousand bags of holding stitched together, lit by illusions from the School of Magus — they stumble into a commotion: a hooded figure sabotaged the microphone of Meta Lica’s frontman Jaime Hetfield, and it exploded in green smoke, leaving him a croaking toad. Standing over him is none other than pop superstar LaDonna, and Foulclaw — who has posters of her at home — chokes so hard on hello that a wild surge shrinks him to half his size.

What follows is a full day of festival hijinks with a dark thread running under it. Xeros charms LaDonna into promising a word with the new director, learns from her that the old director Salieri has been mysteriously pushed aside for the aasimar Wolfgang, and talks his way into the roadies’ backstage game — where Nortle aces a sound-check by rapping Ice Ice Baby in full character. They win backstage passes, and Xeros restores Jaime Hetfield from toad to man (he still sounds like a toad). But the sabotage keeps coming: at another tent the drow guitarist Jimmy Eccentric collapses in a haze of Purple Filth, convinced he’s a corpse; Foulclaw preaches over him while Xeros quietly “converts” his act to Christian rock to knock a rival off the bill. Two curses, two good deeds — and somewhere in the banter Nortle asks the crowd to keep an eye out for his favorite band, Mildly Frustrated at the Machine, who he’s pretty sure got disqualified.

At the Food Tensor Floating Disc Trucks a cooking contest boils over into a genuine monster fight: a rampaging soup golem, born from goblin chef Bacon’s spicy pot, lashes out with a chicken-sausage chain whip, a celery slam, and an onion onslaught. The crew freeze it, dome it, and finally shatter it in a cascade of pho, then sift the wreckage for the truth — a vial of Cursed Sugar slipped into the recipe. That’s three curses now, all bearing the same fingerprint. As the party argues over who could be poisoning an entire festival, Wolfgang himself walks up: he’s heard about them, he’s desperate, and he has an offer. Find whoever is sabotaging his bands and save his Battle of the Bands, and he’ll put the crew straight through to the finale. “Welcome to the Battle of the Bands!” Xeros grins — with no idea he’s said it before, and will say it again.

🎵 Song Recap (rhyming — drop into an AI song generator)

Scheme: AABB verses + chorus. Suggested vibe: neon festival arena-rock with a creeping minor-key undertow.

(Verse 1) Gates of the magic city, the welcome on repeat, A voice in the walls stumbling over the beat; A mic full of smoke and a singer turned toad — Something’s gone rotten on the rock-and-roll road.

(Chorus) Play the Battle of the Bands, but who’s cursing the show? A hooded little shadow that nobody knows! Charm up the diva, rap the sound-check clean — We’re only mildly frustrated at the machine.

(Verse 2) A star in a haze swears he’s already dead, Preach him to Christian rock, get it out of his head; Two curses, two good deeds, keep the tally in view — But the day feels familiar, like we’ve done this all through.

(Verse 3) The soup stands up swinging with a sausage and slam, We chill it, we dome it, and we bury the ham; In the wreck lies the sugar with a curse baked inside — Three saboteur fingerprints we cannot let slide.

(Chorus)

(Outro) Then Wolfgang says help me with a grin and a bow, “Find who’s cursing my bands and the finale’s yours now.” Xeros throws his arms wide like he’s owning the scene — Welcome to the Battle… again, at the machine.

📋 Point-by-point breakdown (player catch-up — everything that happened)

1. 00:03:32 · 🎭 RP — Chris recaps Ch 2.1: the departure of TBD to Magus, the wristband bet with Roses and Gunzes, the Commons chase, and Basil’s brawl with Renata.
2. 00:08:47 · 📖 Lore — Xeros describes Magus: an opalescent ten-mile wall, four gates, a spell-slot economy, and The Arcade first ring that loops into infinity; High Mage Altirius rides along in your head like a magical GPS.
3. 00:23:24 · 🎭 RP — At the entrance, the pre-recorded Altirius greeting blasts on a loop; Xeros and Basil read it aloud (Basil “went blind” on her off week), botching lines as the recording glitches — Xeros dares Chris to leave it running in the background all day.
4. 00:25:59 · 🎲 Mechanic — Xeros rolls his daily vintage: the Spiked Taran Brandy, which lets him yank up to six spell slots off other casters — handy at a festival full of them.
5. 00:29:55 · 🎲 Mechanic — On the way to breakfast the party stops at the oddly small Main Stage Tent (Tent of Holding); Foulclaw’s Detect Magic reveals a few thousand bags of holding sewn together, lit by School of Magus illusions that brighten with the crowd’s roar.
6. 00:38:53 · 📖 Lore — Inside, a toad sits amid worried roadies: a hooded figure sabotaged Jaime Hetfield’s mic, which burst in green smoke and toaded him. Rumors of the same hooded figure ripple across the fairgrounds.
7. 00:41:18 · 🎭 RP — Pop star LaDonna orders Xeros to put the toad down; Foulclaw recognizes her (“Like a Sturgeon”) and is instantly starstruck.
8. 00:43:36 · 🎲 Mechanic — Rolling to see how badly he’ll choke meeting her, Foulclaw hits a nat 1 and his wild magic shrinks him to half size for the hour (clothes and all).
9. 00:49:32 · 🎲 Mechanic — Xeros casts Charm Person on LaDonna (she rolls a 12, fails); charmed, she chats freely and signs an autograph across Foulclaw’s scripture pamphlet.
10. 00:53:49 · 📖 Lore — LaDonna isn’t performing this year, only doing PR; the festival has a new director, Wolfgang, who mysteriously displaced the old one, Salieri.
11. 00:58:15 · 🎲 Mechanic — Foulclaw’s Detect Magic confirms Jaime Hetfield is cursed (remove curse / dispel / restoration needed); the party debates whether to bother helping a rival.
12. 01:07:28 · 🎲 Mechanic — A roadie recognizes Nortle and invites the crew to the Roadie Task Game — five straight DEX checks for backstage passes and the title “Road King.”
13. 01:19:23 · 🎭 RP — For the sound-check leg, Nortle performs Ice Ice Baby in full character and nails it (24 vs the roadies’ 19).
14. 01:22:50 · 🎲 Mechanic — Foulclaw tries to sweep dust in a roadie’s eyes and rolls a nat 1 (gifting him advantage), but the roadie team blows their own clear-stage check and is disqualified; the party sweeps the game.
15. 01:25:05 · 🎭 RP — Xeros tunes every instrument on the stage (an 18, plus his “just going to touch myself with Bardic Inspiration” gag) and licks each one for luck; Road King crown and backstage passes secured.
16. 01:28:26 · 🎲 Mechanic — Xeros casts Lesser Restoration on Jaime Hetfield: it can’t lift the curse, so Chris rules he turns human again but keeps his toad voice. LaDonna leads him off, promising to talk to Wolfgang.
17. 01:33:30 · ⚔️ RP — A haze of Purple Filth spills from a tent; drow guitarist Jimmy Eccentric collapses convinced he’s inhaled deadly gas and died. Xeros dives in, makes his save, and realizes he’s fine; Jimmy Eccentric fails and stays “dead.”
18. 01:37:36 · 📖 Lore — Foulclaw explains Purple Filth: a plant psychedelic cut with Veil-Tear Stone powder, imported through the region’s herbalism trade — and scoops the residue away from Xeros.
19. 01:43:00 · 🎭 RP — Foulclaw preaches Jimmy Eccentric “holier” while Xeros whispers the real plan: convert his act to Christian rock to torpedo a rival (“He’s the new Switchfoot”). A Persuasion 23 changes his heart, and he faints. Sabotage #2 confirmed: a broken vial of Purple Filth.
20. 01:52:55 · 🎭 RP — Namesake beat: Nortle asks the party to watch for his favorite band, Mildly Frustrated at the Machine; Basil is pretty sure they got disqualified, and Chris asks whether that’s even a real band.
21. 02:00:49 · ⚔️ Combat — At the Food Tensor Floating Disc Trucks, a cooking contest erupts into a fight with a soup golem boiled out of Bacon’s spicy pot; initiative is rolled.
22. 02:23:55 · ⚔️ Combat — The golem swings its themed attacks — pepper cannon, celery slam, onion onslaught, chicken-sausage chain whip; Basil catches a flying sausage in her mouth and passes the save not to bite the thing.
23. 02:43:29 · ⚔️ Combat — Nortle’s cold draconic strikes freeze the golem’s leg to half speed (“make him taste his own soup”); Foulclaw upcasts Chromatic Orb via his Scroll of Jubilee and Lamentation.
24. 02:59:27 · ⚔️ Combat — Nortle finishes the golem with a Flurry-of-Blows backfist; Basil domes herself and Nortle in a wall of force against the exploding pho.
25. 03:07:25 · 📖 Lore — Foulclaw’s ritual Detect Magic finds the sabotage: a vial of Cursed Sugar added to the soup. Curse #3, same hand.
26. 03:17:38 · 📖 Lore — Wolfgang walks up (tipped off by LaDonna): someone is cursing his bands, and he begs the crew to find the saboteur.
27. 03:23:56 · 🎲 Mechanic — The deal: unmask the saboteur and save the festival, and the party performs the finale. Xeros accepts — “Welcome to the Battle of the Bands!” — and the session ends.

Player Characters

Character	Player	Race	Class	Note
Xeros	Dave	Tiefling	Bard	Emo ex-boy-band frontman of Year Xeros; solves everything with gold, charm, and a good long con
Nortle	Steve	Tortle	Monk	Socially-anxious ninja-turtle; raps a flawless sound-check and freezes a soup golem with dragon’s breath
Basil	Brin	Harengon	Fighter	Fierce, gem-obsessed, she/her; wall-of-force knuckles, 60-foot leaps, and a mouth ready for flying sausage
Foulclaw	Jesse	Owlin	Sorcerer	Father ITYS missionary with pamphlets ready; wild-magic shrinks himself meeting his celebrity crush
TBD	Chris (GM)	Goliath	Wizard	Adrenaline-junkie rock star; still ahead with Killasaurus while Chris runs the table this arc

NPCs

NPC	Role	Note
LaDonna	Kalashtar superstar	Madonna-parody pop icon doing PR this year; charmed into promising the crew a word with the director
Wolfgang	Festival director	Aasimar who recently, mysteriously rose to run the Battle of the Bands; hires the party to catch the saboteur
Salieri	Former director	The old Battle of the Bands director, pushed aside for Wolfgang for reasons nobody will name
Altirius	High Mage of Magus	Omnipresent AI-like guide and owner of the city; his glitchy pre-recorded greeting loops all day
Jaime Hetfield	Meta Lica frontman	Toaded by a sabotaged mic; restored to human but still croaks; craves a banana-Nutella crepe
Fran Dressa	Ticket-booth attendant	Fran-Drescher-voiced super-fan from the entrance (recap); flirted with by Xeros
Scary Mary	Traveling herbalist	A giant Goliath woman running the herbalist wagon; “Mary” so big everyone calls her Scary
Jimmy Eccentric	Drow guitarist	Jimi-Hendrix-parody rocker; gassed with Purple Filth, sure he’s dead, “converted” to Christian rock
Bacon	Goblin chef	Runs the spicy food truck; swears he followed his recipe as a soup golem climbs out of his pot
Ron the Roadie	Roadie	Recognizes Nortle from his roadie days and runs the backstage Task Game
Renata	Tabaxi (mentioned)	The Forbidden-Fruits brawler from the recap whose fight with Basil streamed for a fortune

Factions

Faction	Note
Meta Lica	Metal-parody band whose toaded frontman Jaime Hetfield is the sabotage’s first victim
Killasaurus	TBD’s band, a Battle of the Bands finalist; the reason he’s here ahead of the party
Roses and Gunzes	Guns-N’-Roses-parody rivals from the road; the wristband bet gets finalized this morning
Mildly Frustrated at the Machine	Rage-Against-the-Machine-parody band, one of Nortle’s favorites; reportedly disqualified
Year Xeros	Xeros’s old boy band (spelled with an X); LaDonna fails to recognize him from it
iBard	iPod-parody music brand sponsoring the main stage; celebrating ~100 years
Choldreth	Spider-creatures whose world-famous mud-wrestling is a festival staple (map rundown)

👹 Monsters

Monster	Threat / Role	Note
Soup Golem	Food-court boss fight	A water-elemental of spicy pho boiled from Bacon’s pot by sabotage; resists nonmagical b/p/s, immune to poison; frozen, domed, and shattered by the party
Jaime Hetfield	Cursed victim (toad form)	Turned into a toad by the sabotaged mic; a hostile-magic set piece rather than a foe — restored, still croaking
The Dreamweaver	Looming BBEG (unseen)	The true architect behind the whole festival — see the DM Notes; not yet known to the party

🎙️ Notable Moments

00:31:21 — The city's own AI greeting can't get through its script; the machine keeps flubbing the same line, take after take.

Xeros: He keeps on saying, oh damn it! It’s like the pre-recorded ones — take three or four. He’s like, did I get my— Nortle: We’ll do it live. Xeros: We’ll do it live!

00:39:06 — Chris drops the inciting sabotage in a flat, matter-of-fact aside that reframes the whole festival.

Chris (GM): During his soundcheck the microphone exploded in a green puff of smoke; he inhaled, and it turned him into a toad. Chris (GM): Nobody knows who the hooded figure was, but there’s rumors throughout the fairgrounds of sightings like this.

00:43:36 — Foulclaw finally meets the pop star whose posters are on his wall, and rolls to see how badly he'll blow it.

Chris (GM): You know you’re attracted to LaDonna — you’ve had posters of her in your room. What you’re rolling for is how much you’re going to choke the first time you talk to her. Foulclaw: Okay, so, fifteen succeeds… I’m going to use the key. Wow. I rolled a one.

00:47:03 — Xeros unleashes his full glowing-tattoo rock-god entrance on LaDonna. It does not land.

Xeros: My eyes go white and my stage presence comes on. My hair blows up in the wind, my tattoos glow burning white — hey, you secondhand heck, you know who you’re talking to? Chris (GM): She does not recognize you, Xeros.

00:54:20 — Asked why the festival has a new boss, the story quietly plants a mystery it has no intention of answering yet.

Basil: What happened to the old one? Chris (GM): Oh, you mean Salieri… we don’t really know what happened. Salieri, for some reason, isn’t directing this year.

01:19:23 — Handed a sound-check, Nortle commits completely — in the accent.

Nortle: Alright, stop. Collaborate and listen. Ice is back with a brand new addition. Something grabs a hold of me tightly, flows like a harpoon daily and nightly… Basil: I’m just ten times more impressed you can do that in the accent.

01:29:25 — Xeros's restoration technically works. The results are debatable.

Chris (GM): It does turn him back into a human. Congratulations. And he just still sounds like a toad. Nortle: So what’s the difference between him before and now? Chris (GM): None. Jaime’s back, guys.

01:43:00 — Under the cover of a genuine conversion, Xeros runs a quieter play: sabotage the sabotaged.

Xeros: You must convert your music to a higher form — from rock and roll to straight Christian rock… so when he goes on stage, he completely disrupts his followers. Nortle: He’s the new Switchfoot.

01:52:55 — The episode's namesake: Nortle, feeling left out of the star-studded day, goes looking for his favorite band.

Nortle: Could you keep your eye out to see if they have the Mildly Frustrated at the Machine band around here? They were one of my favorites. Chris (GM): Mildly frustrated at the what? Basil: I’m pretty sure they got disqualified. Xeros: They may actually start to rage at that point.

02:05:41 — A rampaging soup golem lurches at the party spraying its own ingredients. Basil finds the silver lining.

Chris (GM): …as little bits of carrots and onions fly out of its mouth as it roars and takes a step toward you guys. Basil: Mmm! Carrots!

02:47:09 — The golem's celery slam comes down on Nortle, who defends himself the only way a turtle should.

Nortle: I do the whole Michelangelo moment — my head drops into my shell and the celery goes straight over it. Nortle: I love being a turtle.

03:07:25 — Sifting the wreckage of the soup golem, Foulclaw finds the fingerprint that ties every attack together.

Chris (GM): …a cursed element that had been added to the soup. Specifically, a cursed sugar. Yep — cursed sugar. Foulclaw: Cursed sugar!

03:23:56 — Cornered by his own failing festival, Wolfgang makes the crew an offer that closes the session — and opens the loop.

Wolfgang (GM): Someone is sabotaging the bands. You can help me find out what’s going on. You can help me save my Battle of the Bands. I’ll let you perform the finale, straight up to the top. What do you say? Xeros: Welcome to the Battle of the Bands!

🗺️ Locations

Place	Note
Magus	The preternatural “city of magic”: a ten-mile opalescent wall, four gates, an economy of bartered spell slots, ruled by High Mage Altirius
The Arcade	Magus’s magic-lit first/outer ring, likened to the Vegas strip; loops back on itself into apparent infinity
School of Magus	The magic school inside Magus; its top students project the illusory light shows for the main stage
Main Stage Tent (Tent of Holding)	The finale venue — a few thousand bags of holding sewn together; louder crowd = brighter illusions
Food Tensor Floating Disc Trucks	The fairground’s floating-truck food court; hosts the cooking contest and the soup-golem fight
The Thirsty Maiden	The festival’s pub, known for signature drinks; home of the Let Freedom Ring rap battle (map rundown)
Another Man’s Treasure	Second-hand store of trinkets and old School of Magus textbooks (map rundown)
Kaka Nevermore Theater	The fairground’s theater, run by a kenku named Ken the party “may recognize” (map rundown)
Choldreth Mud Wrestling Arena	The world-famous Choldreth mud-wrestling attraction (map rundown)
Limp the Imp Biscuit’s Fix-It Shop	Back-corner instrument-repair shop of [[Limp the Imp
Commons	Slummy edge of New Old the party crossed en route (recap); site of the wristband chase
New Old	The city whose herbalism-heavy trade exports the Purple Filth flooding the region

🎒 Items

Item	Note
Spiked Taran Brandy	Xeros’s vintage that lets him tether and steal up to six spell slots from nearby casters
Cursed Sugar	The sabotage ingredient slipped into Bacon’s soup that spawned the Soup Golem — curse #3
Purple Filth	Plant psychedelic cut with [[Veil Stone
Scroll of Jubilee and Lamentation	Foulclaw’s scroll; the “jubilee” side upcasts his Chromatic Orb against the golem
Boots of Leaping	Basil’s magical boots — huge leaps onto (and off of) the floating food trucks
Veil-Tear Stones	Necrotic gem powder refined into Purple Filth; the gems Basil swaps into her gauntlets
iBard	iPod-parody device that plays “CDs” (Crystal Dynamics); main-stage sponsor at ~100 years old

⛩️ Pantheon & Lore

Entry	Note
Battle of the Bands	The annual Magus festival the party has come to win — and, this year, to save
The Forgotten Hour	The half-remembered cataclysm; raised when the party wonders how old the ~100-year-old iBard really is
Children’s Crusade	The dark, part-myth history that passed through the Commons; debated in the recap
Father ITYS	The faith Foulclaw preaches; some in the Commons hold animosity toward it and New Old
Selûne	Moon goddess of the temple in New Old; LaDonna’s silver beauty reminds Foulclaw of her
Purple Filth	Veil-tear psychedelic tied back through the region’s trade; a recurring drug thread

Cliffhanger

Three curses, one hidden hand, and a festival quietly coming apart at the seams — and then director Wolfgang himself walks up with an offer soaked in desperation: unmask the saboteur, save his Battle of the Bands, and the crew goes straight through to the finale stage. “Welcome to the Battle of the Bands!” Xeros grins, throwing his arms wide — with no idea he’s said it before, and will say it again.

Transcript

Full cleaned transcript: 241130-ch2.2-mildly-frustrated-at-the-machine-transcript · bundle on the tedit scratch SSD (241130-ch2.2).

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Related: Battle of the Bands · Magus · Wolfgang · LaDonna · Soup Golem · Mildly Frustrated at the Machine · TBD · prev: 241113-ch2.1-wristband-race-war · next: 241219-ch2.3-glizzy-up-the-girl